The gray is the giveaway. It is in the man’s beard and famous hair, which has sold countless bottles of shampoo. Steelers safety Troy Polamalu isn’t as young as he used to be. Tonight’s game against the Cincinnati Bengals could be his final game at Heinz Field. This season likely is his final NFL season.

Mr. Polamalu won’t confirm any retirement plans. “It’s hard to talk years when you live day to day. That’s the thing football has taught me more than anything. Anybody who’s ever tried to make plans with me understands that. If you want to meet me in two weeks for lunch, I’m not making those plans. I live day to day. I’m not going to plan for our playoff game [next weekend] because I don’t know what’s going to happen to me this week. I respect time. I respect life enough not to make those plans.”

But Mr. Polamalu acknowledged that he has played much longer than he anticipated. He is 33, finishing his 12th NFL season. He has missed three games this season with a left knee injury and is questionable to play tonight. “There definitely are aspects of my game that I can’t rely on anymore,” he said. “I’m not as perky or as bouncy as I was in my early years.”

He isn’t afraid of his football clock winding down.

“The reality of getting old in this game is beautiful to me. The evolution of it. The spiritual struggle behind it. All of that is wonderful and beautiful. I’ll joke around sometimes in games, ‘You know, four years ago, I would have been all over that play.’ But would I have been?

I don’t know. Maybe physically. But I don’t know about mentally. Would I have been in the right spot? In terms of understanding the game, it’s more now for me than it’s ever been.”

Mr. Polamalu has made eight Pro Bowls and was the NFL’s Defensive Player of the Year in 2010. He also was the Steelers’ 2010 nominee for the Walter Payton Award because of his community service, especially his tireless work at Children’s Hospital of Pittsburgh of UPMC. He is best known for his long hair, which flows out of his helmet and bounces when he runs. But there is much more to him. He will be remembered as one of the Steelers’ all-time great players and great people.

Mr. Polamalu is unfazed.

“My uncle texted me the other day about legacy. I said something in my mind like, ‘Who really cares about legacy?’ I don’t care. How I’m remembered, if I’m remembered. I think the great thing about my life experiences is what I can share with my children. That is the value. What I can share with anyone who is willing to listen. That, to me, is what life experiences are about.”

Steelers safety Troy Polamalu loses his helmet after a hit on Cleveland's Andrew Hawkins in September. (Peter Diana/Post-Gazette)

‘Lay it all on the line’

Mr. Polamalu said he doesn’t play for money even though he has made millions.“I don’t even know what I make. I’ve never looked at my checks.” He said he doesn’t play for fame. “I’m totally oblivious to it.” He said he doesn’t read newspaper articles or watch television shows about the Steelers. “It’s not hard if you can find a good show on TV and watch the whole season. I’m into ‘Homeland’ right now.” Mr. Polamalu said he isn’t aware of how many Pro Bowls he has made. “I promise you, I don’t know.” He said he doesn’t care if he makes the Hall of Fame. “To me, that’s not the greatest honor. The greatest honor in the greatest team sport is winning the Super Bowl.”

He said if you walked into his Wexford home, you wouldn’t know he played football. “There’s nothing [football-related] there. Nothing.”

He has two young sons, Paisios and Ephraim. He said he plays for them. The way he jumps over the center trying to get to the quarterback? The way he hurtles himself into a pile to make a tackle? He said he does it for his boys.

“I want to go out there and lay it all on the line, whether it’s sacrificing body parts, whether it’s sacrificing limbs, whatever it is. What better lesson could I teach my children? Anything that you do in your life or want to do in your life, whether it’s a small thing or a big thing, you give it your all. My wife understands that about me, that I’m passionate about everything. I’m committed to my marriage as much as I’m committed to my teammates as much as I’m committed to my faith. I try to be all in, yes.”

There is a fine line with NFL football, Mr. Polamalu said. “A Catch 22,” he called it. He knows he has to play all out, all the time, to survive in the league. But he also knows his often-reckless style of play could lead to a serious, even catastrophic injury. It also could lead to severe health problems when he is 50 and beyond.

“Before every game, I tell my wife I love her and tell my boys I love them because I go in with the mentality that it’s going to be my last game,” Mr. Polamalu said. “We understand we’re going to get hurt and it’s not going to make us stronger when we get older. It’s not going to add years to our life. But I want to be a great father to my children, as well. Part of being a great father is seeing me wake up, work out every day, going out on the field, laying it all on the line, feeling sore the next day because I did. To me, that lesson is priceless.”

Mr. Polamalu said he feels “fear” and has “insecurity” before every game. “That gut feeling of excitement and stress. I hate that feeling, but I wonder if I’ll miss it? That’s a question I’ve asked myself not just this year, but my whole career.” Clearly, he has managed his fear of injury. Not every NFL player has. That’s why Mr. Polamalu sounds disgusted when he says the league has “sissified” its game.

“A real aspect of the game is fear. If you can instill fear in somebody and then you take away that aspect of it … The whole collision thing changed because the game became so much more spread out. You’ve got one guy running from the numbers over here to the numbers over here and you have that collision. Now, that guy is running with no fear. He’s not going to alligator the ball because he knows nobody is going to take his head off.”

Mr. Polamalu’s other problem with today’s NFL is that defensive players are fined for hits that he believes should be legal. “That’s real money. That is not Monopoly money.”

Steelers teammate James Harrison, who knows something about being fined, has said he is “willing to go through hell so my kids don’t have to.” Mr. Polamalu respectfully disagrees. “I believe that I need to provide an example to my children. A positive example of work ethic and virtues that really matter. But I also understand that my children need to go through a lot of stuff in their lives and deal with it themselves. When I see my children struggle in a controlled situation, I love it. I have never picked up my sons when they fall down. In terms of them falling down and crying, never. They have learned they have to pick themselves up. I think that’s a great lesson.”

And, yes, Mr. Polamalu will allow his boys to play football. More than a few NFL players have said they will encourage their kids to a sport other than football because of the injury risk, especially concussions. “I don’t understand how players can say that,” he said. “After all this game has done for them, not only on the material level but on a spiritual level. There are many great lessons that you learn in football that you can’t learn in any other aspect of life.”

Troy Polamalu, with wife, Theodora, and two sons, Paisios and Ephraim, at the Steelers annual Black & Gold event in Heinz Field in October, benefiting the UPMC Sports Medicine Concussion Program and the Cancer Caring Center. (Lake Fong/Post-Gazette)

‘There is no one like him’

Mr. Polamalu is a legend at Children’s Hospital because of the time he has spent with young cancer patients. He has cut back his visits since his boys were born but still goes when he can and when he is asked by hospital officials.

“I hope you understand [talking about] this is incredibly uncomfortable for me,” he said.

Mike Shulock, a child-life specialist at the oncology clinic at Children’s Hospital, had no such hesitancy.

“I was thinking that this could be Troy’s last year and I was like, ‘Holy cow, what are we going to do without him?’ Who else can fill those shoes? There is no one like him. I just wish I had a better vocabulary to put into words what he means to this place.”

Normally, Mr. Polamalu slips into the hospital unannounced and will go from one patient room to another.

“I’ve seen him hold babies and get down on the floor and play with the kids,” Mr. Shulock said. “It doesn’t matter if it’s playing a video game or a board game or doing an arts craft. He has a knack of making you feel like you’ve known him for 10 years instead of 10 minutes.

“It could be a kid’s toughest, darkest day and he comes walking in. He’ll leave and the mom will say, ‘That’s the first time he or she has smiled all day, the first time he or she has sat up in bed, the first time he or she has gotten out of bed.’ Troy really makes a difference.”

Mr. Polamalu said he gets as much out of the visits as the kids do. “Maybe it’s just the child within me. I’m just more comfortable around children. I have the sense of humor of a child. I can connect with children. I have more fun with them. Maybe it’s the innocence.”

He has kept in touch with many of the kids and their families. “They’re my friends,” he said. Sadly, many of the patients have died. “More than 10 …

“Since I’ve had kids, it’s given me a completely different understanding of the whole structure and struggle of it. Growing up, I was never into celebrities or autographs or athletes. However, when your child is sick, you will do anything to make them happy. That’s kind of given me a level of understanding that if someone calls me from Children’s, ‘Hey, we’ve got someone who would really like a visit from you,’ you just go. You don’t think about it.”

The kids at Children’s Hospital will be glad to know Mr. Polamalu is staying in Pittsburgh this winter. He has sold his home in California. He won’t commit to living here long term — you know how he is with plans — but said, “I love it here. My children go to school here. They’re in a wonderful school. I can’t imagine taking them out of that school.”

Mr. Polamalu talked about staying with the Steelers in some capacity after he retires. “Maybe at some point in my life, I would like to try to help out somehow.”

‘We win with camaraderie’

Even if Mr. Polamalu moves away, he said he will come back for the reunions of the Steelers’ Super Bowl teams of 2005 and 2008. It won’t be to hear the cheers, although he surely will get the loudest from the Heinz Field crowd, just as he does now. “It’s all about the connection with the other guys.”

He mentioned Mr. Harrison as an example.

“If I’m not here, Brett Keisel’s not here, Ike Taylor’s not here, James doesn’t come back to play this season … There are ways we do things here. The power of this organization is in the locker room. To me, it’s like silk. You have a different tailor that comes in. Bill Cowher does it how he wants to do it. Coach [Mike] Tomlin does it how he wants to do it. But the power of this organization is in the locker room. We don’t win with talent. We win with camaraderie, with the power of 53 being one. That’s been the strength of our organization. That’s passed down. That’s been passed down since the ’70s.”

Mr. Polamalu said the Steelers’ locker room is stronger than it was the past two seasons when the team finished 8-8. He said everyone is buying into team first, me second. “For sure. Honestly, it’s getting through.”

No matter what happens against the Bengals, the Steelers will play a postseason game next weekend. If they win tonight, they will play at home, probably against the San Diego Chargers or Baltimore Ravens. If they lose, they will go to Indianapolis to play the Colts.

Mr. Polamalu won’t look that far ahead, of course. Nor will he waste even a minute now looking back on his memorable career. There is too much to do, he said.

“I’m trying to create more, better memories.”