Send up to three entries to page2@post-gazette.com or mail to: Caption Contest, Portfolio, PG, 34 Blvd. of the Allies, Pittsburgh, PA 15222.

Please include your address and neighborhood. Deadline: May 26. The winners, published here in two weeks, receive un PG parapluie.

First Place
"What do you mean, pilot sold separately?"
-- Sue Gillen, Ben Avon

Second Place
"Pardon me, but do you have any Grey Poupon?"
-- Dann Carr, Ambridge

Third Place
"What do you mean, 'This is the wrong city'?"
-- Dave Burns, Darlington Township